Tag Archives: finding our hunger

eating disorders, fitness, thinspo, fitspo and the lesson i learned talking about all of it

I’ve been lecturing and teaching for the past 15 years and aside from a healthy dose of nervous energy that quickly passes, I couldn’t be more comfortable in those roles. Being interviewed, however, is an entirely different story. I get incredibly nervous nearly every time and while I can calm myself down for the most part, the live and/or recorded interviews get me every time! Most notably (and I can’t even believe I’m drawing attention to it) was my television appearance. As soon as the camera began to roll, my brain fell out of my head and I felt like a deer in headlights – completely stunned and trying to remember what I wanted to say and how I wanted to say it.

Most recently, I did my very first podcast with Kaila Prins for her Finding Our Hunger podcast series. When she asked me to do this podcast I desperately wanted to say “no.” But I said “yes” because I knew it was the right thing to do. I wanted to get the word out about Destructively Fit and saying “no” to an opportunity just seemed counterintuitive.

My podcast date was set and as it got closer, my anxiety grew and grew and grew. I made sure to tell Kaila how nervous I was, that this was my first podcast, and that I needed her help to keep the conversation going. Obviously Kaila was a pro and this was her plan anyway. So if I’m being completely honest with you (and myself), I think I was also telling her how nervous I was so that it could be my excuse if i completely blew it!

The dreaded day arrived and there I was, headphones on in the comfort of my own home. I was so nervous that I couldn’t sit down! I watched the clock and it seemed it was going backwards – this podcast was going to take forever! But we began and Kaila kicked off the podcast. She had a little (read: a lot) of an edge since this was her gig but I have to hand it to her, she was a natural! She was interested, interesting and spontaneous. I was even able to sit down! The podcast was easy, fun and the time flew. Wow! In fact, I’ve gotten lots of (unsolicited) feedback about it and I’m told that it’s my best, most natural and engaging interview yet!

I’m actually very proud of myself for saying “yes” to this opportunity but even more so for being open, vulnerable and compassionate with myself.

It’s funny, as soon as I got out of my own way things were great! I shut down that negative self-talk reminding me that I froze on television and that I have to choose my words carefully so that I sound intelligent enough. I just allowed myself to be present and engaged and that was all I needed to do! What a great reminder for me to trust myself!

I hope that you can learn from my experience, even reflect upon your own past experiences, and realize that your best self is your most authentic self!

Oh… and if you want to listen to my podcast, I’d love you to! Any and all feedback is welcome 🙂
Here it is http://findingourhunger.com/2014/07/30/undestructive/

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